 
				    				Karma62 ( member #23320)		posted at 9:29 PM on Friday, March 20th, 2009	
			 
	You seem to be the experienced person.  I am new.  My only comment on your primer is the not spending time together part initially.  Ok,.... like the first 2  - weeks painful,  but the next  2 months were  key to spend time (or is that the 3 - 6 month thing?).  We took two trips since D-day,  skiing and the UK,  both good ideas for us and our therapist said also. He  goes away and  I am lost. Being togehter seems to help,  for both of us to get over this. 
 
			 			Me: BS 48
Him:  FWH 64
Married 19
D-Day # 1  31-10-07  EA??  (Denied!)
D-Day # 2  17-12-08 Full PA  both years same OW
OW 37S Neighbour (NC)
Working on R with hope
"You have  been Weighed,  Measured and you have  been  Found wanting" -		
	 	 			 
				    				JoePike ( member #13207)		posted at 12:54 PM on Thursday, April 2nd, 2009	
			 
	Bump for Allybam and other newcomers  
 
 
			 			"Do or do not. There is no Try" - Yoda.
"The term “mistake” infers a level of ignorance, innocence and naivety. And a lack of intent and planning." - Craig Harper		
	 	 			 
				    				newyear ( member #22713)		posted at 1:35 PM on Thursday, April 2nd, 2009	
			 
	Once again, Thanks for your information and sharing your thoughts. 
 
			 			WH 62--hired the same prostitute during his overseas business trips to Shanghai, China in 6/08 & 12/08 
BW 59
M 38 yr
2 daughters 29 & 27--Both are M 
DDay 7/08--Took him 6 months to defogged and admitted the A 
12/08 --Working very hard on the R		
	 	 			 
				    				SuspiciousWife ( member #18108)		posted at 11:39 PM on Wednesday, April 8th, 2009	
				Me - BW, 44
Him - FWH, 44
OW - former co-worker
3 great kids
DDay - April 25, 2008 - mostly EA with one make-out session		
	 	 			 
				    				gma56 ( member #19595)		posted at 5:51 AM on Tuesday, April 28th, 2009	
			 
	Bump it to the top !  
 
 
			 			BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.		
	 	 			 
				    				snowdrop ( member #23594)		posted at 10:12 AM on Tuesday, April 28th, 2009	
			 
	This has been really, really helpful; thank you! 
 
			 			Me: BW, 38
WH: 37
2 DS
DDays:first one was Feb 09.
Separating, after 18 months of trying to R. 		
	 	 			 
				    				redrock ( member #21538)		posted at 1:50 AM on Friday, May 1st, 2009	
				I don't respect anyone that can't spell a word more than one way:)		
	 	 			 
				    				hecheated400 ( member #23602)		posted at 9:12 PM on Sunday, May 3rd, 2009	
			 
	A must read for all newbies on JFO. Thanks so much! 
 
 
	bump. 
 
			 			WH - 60
BS - 57 me
married 12/26/08
f4D 1/06/09		
	 	 			 
				    				Jodi ( member #23781)		posted at 11:42 PM on Sunday, May 3rd, 2009	
			 
	Thank you for taking the time to do this. It really helps.  I justt found out about the A a couple weeks ago and am still in a state of disbelief and feel paralized to do anything. 
 
			 	 			 
				    				kluelesskat ( member #23552)		posted at 7:58 AM on Tuesday, May 5th, 2009	
				Me - BS 
Him - WS 
MOW - Ole fatty w 2 others on the side besides mine and her husband
		
	 	 			 
				    				 SerJR (original poster  member #14993)		posted at 3:21 AM on Friday, May 8th, 2009	
			 
	Updates made  
 
 
			 			Me: BH - Happily remarried.
Hope is never lost. It exists within you - it is real. It is not a force in and of itself - it is something that you create with every thought, action, and choice you make. It is a gift that you create for yourself.		
	 	 			 
				    				thyme2go ( member #12908)		posted at 6:52 PM on Monday, May 11th, 2009	
				BH - no longer 50
3 DD's - (32, 28 and 21)
Divorced on 8/6/09
 		
	 	 			 
				    				itspjw ( member #21268)		posted at 5:10 PM on Tuesday, May 12th, 2009	
				no, I can't take one more step towards you...cuz all that's waiting is regret...
there's just too much that time cannot erase
dday 9/11/08
And the more I know, the less I understand
Because of you...I am afraid...
		
	 	 			 
				    				 SerJR (original poster  member #14993)		posted at 3:23 AM on Friday, May 15th, 2009	
				Me: BH - Happily remarried.
Hope is never lost. It exists within you - it is real. It is not a force in and of itself - it is something that you create with every thought, action, and choice you make. It is a gift that you create for yourself.		
	 	 			 
				    				gma56 ( member #19595)		posted at 5:10 AM on Sunday, May 17th, 2009	
				BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.		
	 	 			 
				    				gma56 ( member #19595)		posted at 8:18 PM on Sunday, May 17th, 2009	
			 
	More pain so giving it front page  
 
 
			 			BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.		
	 	 			 
				    				Joyslyn ( new member #24027)		posted at 4:30 AM on Monday, May 18th, 2009	
			 
	Wow.  Thank you!  Just began reading this post... and am compelled to bump again. 
 
			 			D-Day: 4/6/09, Holy Week
A lasted 7 months.  
M 8 years.  Together 11 years.
My 2nd M.  His 3rd M.
2 kids each - 24, 17, 15, 14
0 kids together
bs 45 (me)
wh 55
ow 51 		
	 	 			 
				    				JustKeepSwimmig ( member #19269)		posted at 5:50 PM on Friday, May 22nd, 2009	
				Mr. JKS - EA/PA 
DDay - April 2008		
	 	 			 
				    				SuspiciousWife ( member #18108)		posted at 3:24 PM on Thursday, May 28th, 2009	
				Me - BW, 44
Him - FWH, 44
OW - former co-worker
3 great kids
DDay - April 25, 2008 - mostly EA with one make-out session		
	 	 			 
				    				Hell a fury ( new member #24115)		posted at 3:43 PM on Thursday, May 28th, 2009	
			 
	Thank-you. Wish I'd read this sooner, before acting like a hot head.