Me: WW (36) Him: BH (35) DDay: August 31, 2011 RA DDay: January 29th, 2020

13 Years Later

Hello,
13 years after my affair, my BH brought it up. While I completely understand the hurt does not go away, I just do not know how to help him. Since DDay we've reconciled, gone to therapy, had a successful life and marriage, had a child, etc. He did have an EA about 6 years ago along with an addiction struggle that he is in recovery for.

When he brought it up he said he will never allow himself to love me or anyone like he did prior to DDay. He said he has had little to no happiness, but when he married me he said forever so he's committed to that. He does say he loves me and our child, but I just don't know how to support him through this. Maybe he should have divorced me all those years ago. I asked about therapy and he says no it does nothing. I'm pouring myself into communicating and supporting him, but also selfishly feel like why should I do all of this when he hasn't fully poured himself into loving me back. I'm open to any and all thoughts. I can handle it. Thank you.

5 comments posted: Thursday, November 21st, 2024

Texting apps

I want to be able to read my spouses texts. I suspect he is have an affair. Is there a way to do this without him knowing? Do I have to have access to his phone?

Thanks!

2 comments posted: Wednesday, May 30th, 2018