Me 33, xwh POS had a pa while I was pregnant. My kids, DD 10 DS 4.They will see me through this trauma. Dday January 2016 Divorced finally January 2017

New beginning relationship is over

Hi all! Not sure if I’ve ever posted in new beginnings! It was always offer support in the other forums.
Divorced after xwh cheated on my while pregnant. Had to bring up a a 5 year old dd and raise my new born ds while xwh started a new life with ap. I was broken. BUT I got through it. I became stronger. I became in different. I moved on. I started dating someone 3 years after my divorce. We had been seeing each other for 4 years however I’ve decided to end things due to the way he treated me last week while away on vacation. He was very nasty about my dd going through a crises at home and couldn’t understand why I was on the phone to her trying to soothe her. He acted like me being upset at not being home (other country) and not being able to console her was ruining the holiday and then proceeded to tell me I was an over the top parent who was raising anxiety riddled children. So I’m done. I told him yesterday. But he’s been hounding me since. He turned up at my house today (we don’t live together). He thinks I’m making a mistake and others do things much worse and get a pass. Just after some advice on how to handle all this please! I know I’ll be ok I just need to get through this. It’s upsetting me greatly.
Thanks for reading ❤️

7 comments posted: Friday, September 1st, 2023

Karma has finally prevailed

I never thought I’d see the day. My xwh and ow have broken up 6 years after blowing up my family.

Xwh rang me to say they broke up in March but he has a new partner now (more on this in a mo). Ow has came home and found them in bed and has attacked new gf. Police are involved. Ow works for ambulance service and was wearing uniform when attacking new partner. So chances are she will lose her job. She was also screaming she’s going to destroy xwh. When she came into my life while I was pregnant she was vile. She also attacked xwh 6 years ago but he told my solicitors it was an isolated incident

Turns out xwh new partner is a girl he works with. The serial cheat has followed his usual script and cheated on ow with this new one which was what happened when he cheated on me. He was Ow boss and he’s now this one’s boss. He is playing the victim and saying ow has been cheating on him and they haven’t been right for 2 years. Claims ow got him arrested in January claiming he was hitting her. It’s all so messy and toxic. People would say to me you don’t know what’s going on behind closed doors (their social media displayed a happy relationship according to others).

So he blew up his family unit for zero. I’m in a much better place but all of this has dragged me backwards in my healing. But it is nice to see karma coming along! He’s never bothered with my children since I divorced him. He’s now trying to be my best friend and I need to put that boundary up straight away he thinks we can bond as I’ve always stated what a nutter ow is. I’ll never forgive him for what he did.

18 comments posted: Saturday, July 23rd, 2022

I don’t know how to feel about this?

Hi guys, merry Christmas to you all!

I’m hoping for some advice please. My current bf of 1.5 years has just been on the phone. He’s at work today. I asked how his day has been. He said he left work for an hour to open presents with his children (9 and 6). I asked him where and he told me his xww house. Now this has shocked me. He doesn’t have to run his life by me but he never mentioned they even spoke never mind arranged this. I don’t know if I’m just supposed to be ok about this as he told me? Thanks to infidelity though my anxiety has just hit the roof. I’m now thinking how often is he speaking to her or seeing her that I don’t know about?

Thanks for listening x

4 comments posted: Friday, December 25th, 2020

I need to end new relationship

Been divorced over 3 years now. I met someone online 11 months and have been dating ever since.

Slowly but surely I’ve seen the man changing in front of me. From being invested in the early months,kind, attentive and really trying and wanting to spend time with me to it dwindling. He doesn’t even treat me that well anymore. No cuddles. No asking how my day was. He led me to believe he wanted a future where we lived together (further down the line) to stating he never wants to live with me as it’s too complicated. I did break it off with him as we wanted different things. I’m only in my early 30s and would love to share my life fully with someone. However he brought me back in by saying he did want a future. This has changed yet again to saying he’s happy in his house and me in mine. Last night he came over. I made him a cup of coffee. I then bathed and put my children to bed. I then cooked tea. I then did the washing up. I asked him to put the bin out for the bin men in the morning. He refused saying we live in an age of equality now and I should do it. It was raining and I’d just had a shower. He couldn’t even do one kind thing for me after I’d done everything (it was also his day off so he wasn’t even tired from work). This is what I was like with xwh. He didn’t have to lift a finger. I’m so so done. I deserve better. Thanks for listening I just needed to vent.

29 comments posted: Friday, June 19th, 2020

Will the hurt ever go?

Hi all!

First time posting in new beginnings! I’ve lurked for a while.

Quick background. I found texts on that fateful Dday over 4 years ago. I was pregnant with our 2nd child when he had a PA. my son was 16 days old when I found out. Tried to reconcile which only lasted a few weeks as he was still in contact with ow. I filed. Been divorced now over 3 years.

The good: I survived. I became a single mother with ease (he was a dead weight, never actually helped with the parenting or housework. Always tired from work even though I also worked) I bought my own house. Got a better paid job and did a lot of work on me. I’m independent and much stronger.

The bad: xwh is stlll with ow. They’ve just bought a house. In the beginning I got a lot of abuse from her saying she won and a lot of other hurtful things. As much as I never want the pos back my thoughts do venture to feeling like I can see how she thinks she did win. They can play happy families with my children and now live together. They both got better paid jobs after being sacked (he was her manager). I can’t deny it all stings. Will these feelings ever go? I’m hoping it just takes time. I look back at how far I’ve came from the hysterical crying and pain in the beginning. I feel like I’m being bitter that I still want them to break up. But clearly that’s not happening. Maybe it’s just human nature to feel like this!

Anyways thanks so much for reading! Any advice Or any of your experiences would be much appreciated

20 comments posted: Friday, May 1st, 2020