Just found out about online activity
I've been with my partner for almost 7 years and we have a 5 year old together. Since COVID he's developed a spiraling porn addiction. Before, I never cared about him watching porn, but I did say that I considered one-on-one contact such as on OnlyFans to be cheating. He claims he doesn't remember me saying that.
Last week, I found he had profiles on OnlyFans and FetLife where he has been messaging multiple women. There was only one explicit conversation and I'm 99% sure he's never actually done anything with anyone else IRL. But I feel so betrayed and my trust has been shattered.
We are trying to work through this and there have been lots of positive steps, but it's just so hard not to always feel paranoid. Now when I see him on the computer or on his phone, I just feel sick to my stomach. I've always felt like I could completely trust him and I feel like a fool.
What's it like to build trust back after something like this? I almost feel silly asking this because he never physically cheated, but I'm still so hurt. What are the first steps?
4 comments posted: Monday, November 14th, 2022
