Are you really sorry if you huff and puff when i’m sad

Note: this affair was all online, and it was both emotional, suggestive and outright sexual at times.

Dday was in August 2022, but i knew for almost a year before that, and accused him multiple times. It took me until August to confirm because I knew it would break me.

After i found out for sure, undeniable proof, he was upset i snooped, guilted me, and he wanted to try being a poly sorta thing, but he only wanted it with one girl and only on his side. I only agreed because i wanted him to choose me, but he kept choosing her in most ways. I lost myself in that time, more than i did in the time he was cheating and I knew, but didnt look for proof. It killed me. She left him 3 months after, because she knew the winds were changing and after showing him what he was doing to me, purposefully or not, he was being less of a ‘We’ with her, and went to being slightly more of a ‘we’ with me. Slightly but even the slightly scared her off because she wanted him in her side always, and was scared that he actually loved me.

He kept chasing her and i told him how much it hurt me, but he continued on doing it for 5 months after she ‘left’ him.

Why would i stay, right? Like that’s embarrassing of me to. But he kept saying she was special but i was specialer and he just wanted both, i dunno. He gaslit me alot into thinking he can be so disrespectful of me and our children, yet still love me.

Fast forward to December 2023, i cried once again about how he doesn’t hate or despise her for disrespecting me and his children for her part in it, and he (in a huff and ouff) told me he blocked her.
For one, i wanted him to do it because he wanted to, so doing it in a huff and puff frustrated way wasn’t what i wanted and just proved he valued her emotionally than me. Or himself because he said he never wanted to totally block her out of his life.

Secondly, told him many times thqt i wanted her to know that he rejected her and didnt want anything to do with her disgusting cheating self, but at least he could openly block her so she knows he wants nothing to do with her if he didnt want to directly tell her.

Fast forward to today, i found out he only slyly blocked her to where she cant even see he blocked her messages. He only blocked her on messenger not on facebook, so she cant see he blocked her.

I confronted him about this and he huff and puffed and is just frustrated at me.

So, am i over reacting? If someone you love is hurt, do you huff and puff, or do you do anything in your power to comfort and protect her heart? Or at least something inbetween

4 comments posted: Wednesday, January 31st, 2024