In a nightmare Situation with exstranged husband

I'm in a very difficult situation. I'm really struggling.
Back in January My husband told me had a Month long affair with a woman he met, while she was on Vacation in Miami Beach,where we live. They met for drinks and they ended up sleeping together the first night.

She extended her stay and they continued the affair for just a little over a month.

My husband and I were in a good place, we were trying to start a family.

I didn't Even noticed there was a change in our relationship as in if he was having an affair. We were still very sexually active.

He was still very loving, but, I did notice around a week or so before he confessed to me that, he had become a little withdrawn as if something were bothering him.I would often catch him, spacing out, when I would ask him if everything was okay he would say everything was fine.

He became much more attached to me not wanting me to take a trip with friends, not wanting me to be far from him. My husband was always affectionate and loving, but he just seemed overly so, a lot more hugs a lot more.More kisses, wanting a lot more sex and buying whatever I wanted.
My husband told me that he had to get it off his chest. What he had done to me. He was sick with guilt. He felt absolutely terrible. He ended it with her.He said she has been calling and texting saying she's in love with him showing up at his job and apparently her family owns a house here in Miami Beach so she's free to stay for as long as she wants.

So there was no telling how long this woman would be in the picture.

He wanted to let me know that he was sorry that he was still in love with me and loved me. He was also changing his phone number. He said he has wanted to tell me for some time. He felt guilty after every time they slept together.

I'm not a fool fool. I told him what he did was absolute betrayal and I would never do anything like that to him and I asked him to leave. He did leave. He went to stay with his brother a few miles away. I told him I really needed to think about things. To leave me alone. I was in a relationship years ago, engaged and my ex-fiance cheated on me. I found out luckily before we walked down the aisle and I left him. So I do have some trust issues there.
My husband has been respectful out of my need for time and space. He often called to ask if I am okay that but he never pushed himself on me or pushed me to make a decision. It's been a few months now,I was very conflicted. Mind a mess, then I find out I'm pregnant. I didn't tell my husband anything.
A week ago this woman comes to my work and shows me a pregnancy test that she is pregnant with my husband's baby and she wants my husband to be with her and his child, she knows we're not living together, she says she is in love with him. She's having his baby. She demanded he take a paternity test. She had filed something in court demanding he take a paternity test which I did not know could happen before a child was born?!

Apparently it can happen, she is almost four months, right at the point enough DNA can be procured.

She seems crazy to me. She's stalking him, she's claiming she's madly in love with him, but he refuses to see her, because he wants me. She wants me to step away and take into consideration the baby. I do take the baby into consideration, I know the baby is the innocent one in all of this, and he/she deserves to have a father.
I'm just sick anxiety. I haven't had any face to face interaction with my husband. I travel a lot for work and so does he. Chat with him on the phone and I know he is in NYC for work and with family, I didn't tell him what I know or that this woman is trying to Serve him papers.
It's just so much to wrap my head around. The SHOCK that another woman is having my husband's baby and I am pregnant and the babies will be born around the same time. I'm not sure I should tell him I'm pregnant and maybe have an abortion or tell him, I want to divorce and move permanently to California, and have the baby secretly?
I know he is returning home to Miami this evening, he asked if he could stop by on his way from the airport to pick up a few things. I have a feeling he will be served at the airport?! The anticipation of what this evening may bring has me sick. I don't know what to do. That's why I'm reaching out for any advice. Help!!! I'm going crazy here!

28 comments posted: Sunday, April 21st, 2024