Where do I put myself in BS’ rollercoaster of emotions?

It has been a month since my DDay and attempt to end it all. Like what some have advised here - my BS is in a rollercoaster of emotions. He would be upset and mean to me at one point, and suddenly he would be say that he believes I am still a good person deep inside.

At the moment, my driving force to get up and fix myself is the fact that I believe this would also help him. As selfish as I had been, I would like to be able to at least help him heal. I am hoping we can still reconcile, but if my presence is not helping, I will understand and move on.

Now he wants to do some solo travels and explore which I fully support. His first trip will be in Europe for a week and he mentioned that he is meeting someone who fancies him (this will be their first time to meet as they know each other from a mobile game). At first the green eyed monster ruled me, but eventually I helped him prep for the trip. He keeps saying that he is going there to find himself, but I cannot help but think of the probable reason he chose this place out of all countries.

Recently though, he has been quite frisky and we had sex a couple of times. I have to say, our intercourse has never been this wild and hot. He cannot bear to kiss me still though. And most times he does not want us to sleep in the same bed.

I am uncertain how I should act now. I told him it would be best to have IC before making any decisions (as there are times he really wants a divorce). I promised him that I will not leave him until he has healed or at least moved on. However, does this include being intimate and physical?

Any advice would be appreciated, thanks.

1 comment posted: Tuesday, November 26th, 2024

My Ted talk

Hi, I would like to first thank this site and this particular forum as reading the stories, responses and most especially the pinned topics of the wayward’s side and maia’s survival guide have literally helped me through this dark phase in my life, as, I am certain, they have many others.

1 comment posted: Thursday, November 21st, 2024