Is this really on the path to reconciliation?
A little over a month ago I confronted my wife informing her that I knew she was having an affair. She immediately responded with "I'm glad you brought that up, his name is XXXX (first name only), I want a divorce". We have spent the time away from each other with a few phone and in person conversations. While I have tried to keep the road to reconciliation open, she has focused on moving on with her life and her new love interest.
Over the course of the next few weeks I was able to discover who this person was, his financial situation (exceedingly poor), work history (even worse), 3 ex-wives and children he has not supported. I would be less than honest if I said this was simply to protect my wife from a gold digger (which in large measure it was) but far from the only reason. I presented my wife with the information I unearthed (reports, pictures, court documents etc.), her initial reaction was that I had manufactured the information. I suggested she look into this herself as I doubted that this would be the type of person she would get involved with had she known ahead of time.
Rather than look into what I gave her, she handed the information to the new boyfriend who exploded and told her to "get the "F" out of my house. (Not really his house, he's trading some handyman services for a place to live in a small duplex) She shared the event during a short road trip she suggested following the confrontation to pick up a desk at her sisters house. "the road trip will give us a chance to talk"
Now she sees the marriage as worth saving. "Anyone who would go to such lengths to protect me is worth my love". She has asked if I was ready to split our time between our beach condo (where she has been staying) and main home? She has a new found interest in how I'm doing but frankly, when she calls and askes "how are you this morning, still emotional?" I get a little agitated, emotional? Really?
While I am somewhat encouraged that the affair appears to be over (she says it is), I can't help but feel I am just a safe harbor for the near term?
21 comments posted: Saturday, November 23rd, 2024
