This Topic is Locked
Notthevictem ( member #44389) posted at 9:24 PM on Tuesday, September 29th, 2020
Been better, but haven't we all?
BH
DDAY Mar 2014
Widowed 2022 - breast cancer
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 7:11 PM on Wednesday, September 30th, 2020
Unexpected turn of events. My attorney and paralegal were trying to get an earlier court date for me. They emailed me last night. I guess the judge signed off and rubber stamped everything. I am officially divorced, as of yesterday, on my 20th anniversary.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 7:56 PM on Wednesday, September 30th, 2020
How are you feeling? Are you ready for 'congratulations'?
I ask because I'm projecting: D being final on the 20th anniversary would be bittersweet for me.
I'm glad it didn't drag on. Once you know what you want, the quicker you get it, the better.
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 8:01 PM on Wednesday, September 30th, 2020
Thanks, sisoon. The fact that I moved out almost three years ago, and my d-days being almost 10 years ago means this has dragged on for a bit.
I will take congratulations in the context of moving forward. I do have mixed feelings, as I will always feel some form of love for her. I mean... I didn't marry her because I wanted to divorce her, right? And yes. A bittersweet moment for sure.
Looking forward to moving on and forging the rest of my life as a single guy. Going to be interesting!
steadychevy ( member #42608) posted at 2:28 AM on Thursday, October 1st, 2020
Congratulations, Losfer, and I'm sorry. I understand what you're saying. Not something to celebrate really but new reality. I never wanted to be divorced but it was the only solution for me. Onward and upward from here.
BH(me)72(now); XWW 64; M 42 yrsDDay1-01/09/13;DDay2-26/10/13;DDay3-19/12/13;DDay4-21/01/14LTA-09/02-06/06? OM - COW 4 years; "dates" w/3 lovers post engagement;ONS w/stranger post commitment, lies, lies, liesSeparated 23/09/2017; D 16/03/2020
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 4:12 AM on Thursday, October 1st, 2020
Thanks, Steady. I do need to find some way to celebrate. Not out of vindication, but because I can move on. I'm glad you get it, and I appreciate your congrats. Thank you! Onward and upward for sure!
william ( member #41986) posted at 5:30 AM on Friday, October 2nd, 2020
hi all,
back again after a break from the site. just needed time to get my mind straight, recover, and figure out a path forward.
me - bh
her - lara01
from 09/11 - 05/13
2 ONS, 10 sexting partners, 1 LT EA/PA
??/06/13 DD/1 - admits to LT EA, begin false R.
01/13/14 DD/2 - LTA was PA.
01/18/14 DD/3 - sexting 5 guys.
01/19/14 DD/4 - 2 ONS with different guys
Notthevictem ( member #44389) posted at 6:27 AM on Friday, October 2nd, 2020
well, good thing covid is keeping everybody in doors, cause i don't think the single women in your state are properly prepared for a single losfer.
Shit is about to get real.
BH
DDAY Mar 2014
Widowed 2022 - breast cancer
Notthevictem ( member #44389) posted at 6:28 AM on Friday, October 2nd, 2020
got a path forward william?
BH
DDAY Mar 2014
Widowed 2022 - breast cancer
william ( member #41986) posted at 3:28 AM on Saturday, October 3rd, 2020
yeah I realized I wouldn't ever trust her again, I detached and did the 180, and had the divorce finalised in mid August.
whatever path I'm on I'm on it without her. it feels weird in some ways but is also a massive load off of me. I feel younger, I'm sleeping better, I'm eating healthier and better, and I'm happier.
me - bh
her - lara01
from 09/11 - 05/13
2 ONS, 10 sexting partners, 1 LT EA/PA
??/06/13 DD/1 - admits to LT EA, begin false R.
01/13/14 DD/2 - LTA was PA.
01/18/14 DD/3 - sexting 5 guys.
01/19/14 DD/4 - 2 ONS with different guys
Incarnate ( member #46085) posted at 4:54 PM on Saturday, October 3rd, 2020
I could have sworn I typed up a reply here, but now I'm late getting up for work so I'm rushing my morning. I'll check in later, y'all. Hope you're all doing well.
Me: BH
She: EW
Divorce in progress
DD1: 11/29/14
DD2: 8/14/19
What a wicked game we play.
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 11:33 PM on Saturday, October 3rd, 2020
Good to see you, william. Looks like you are about a month ahead of me. Glad to see some weight has lifted off your shoulders!
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 11:36 PM on Saturday, October 3rd, 2020
well, good thing covid is keeping everybody in doors, cause i don't think the single women in your state are properly prepared for a single losfer.
Slow down there, NTV! 
My first weekend as a single man has so far consisted of a bucket of KFC, some beer, and my TV. Not moving too far from my recliner this weekend. 
william ( member #41986) posted at 3:54 AM on Sunday, October 4th, 2020
thanks.
nice to see you too.
just needed a break to get my mind sorted out and catch my breath. this site can get grim dark sometimes...
what do you have planned AFTER the divorce loafer? not like long term plans but going to go out and do anything just for yourself? take a hike, get that 'whatever', sleep in?
[This message edited by william at 10:14 PM, October 3rd (Saturday)]
me - bh
her - lara01
from 09/11 - 05/13
2 ONS, 10 sexting partners, 1 LT EA/PA
??/06/13 DD/1 - admits to LT EA, begin false R.
01/13/14 DD/2 - LTA was PA.
01/18/14 DD/3 - sexting 5 guys.
01/19/14 DD/4 - 2 ONS with different guys
steadychevy ( member #42608) posted at 10:16 PM on Sunday, October 4th, 2020
It's been a while since you've been here, William. Nice to see you again. I wondered what had happened. I see now. Sorry about the outcome. My divorce was final in April. I wondered if this wouldn't be the result with you. Welcome back.
BH(me)72(now); XWW 64; M 42 yrsDDay1-01/09/13;DDay2-26/10/13;DDay3-19/12/13;DDay4-21/01/14LTA-09/02-06/06? OM - COW 4 years; "dates" w/3 lovers post engagement;ONS w/stranger post commitment, lies, lies, liesSeparated 23/09/2017; D 16/03/2020
Tred ( member #34086) posted at 12:24 AM on Monday, October 5th, 2020
My first weekend as a single man has so far consisted of a bucket of KFC, some beer, and my TV.
Los, I'm certain that checks a box for a lot of women somewhere. If your dating profile was just that you'd weed out a lot of riff raff that just ain't ready for that high life.
Married: 27 years (14 @JFO) D-Day: 11/09/11"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)
Unhinged ( member #47977) posted at 1:50 PM on Monday, October 5th, 2020
Losfer, whether your D calls for congratulations or commiserations, I'm wishing you the best, brother.
Married 2005
D-Day April, 2015
Divorced May, 2022
"The Universe is not short on wake-up calls. We're just quick to hit the snooze button." -Brene Brown
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 8:22 PM on Monday, October 5th, 2020
Los, I'm certain that checks a box for a lot of women somewhere. If your dating profile was just that you'd weed out a lot of riff raff that just ain't ready for that high life.
Do you think if I were wearing coveralls that would round out the package? Going for high class here. Appreciate the advice, kind sir.
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 8:24 PM on Monday, October 5th, 2020
Losfer, whether your D calls for congratulations or commiserations, I'm wishing you the best, brother.
I will take both, Hinged! Thank you. I appreciate the kind words. Gonna be alright. Gonna be more than alright!
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 4:26 PM on Tuesday, October 6th, 2020
I'll add my late congratulations and commiseration.
No honest person gets M to get D'ed, but when D is right, it gives you freedom and starts a new adventure, IMO. That's pretty good, also IMO.
Still, change is a PITA....
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
This Topic is Locked
