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Newest Member: EraticProphet

Reconciliation :
Intuition/ he really didn’t give her gifts?

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Vocalion ( member #82921) posted at 11:48 PM on Saturday, October 26th, 2024

I have been in an ongoing process of reconciliation with Mrs Vocalion since her first bare bones , as it turned out, very limited confession 27 months ago . Since then much, much more has been revealed to me as my wife's self preservation instinct was discarded and she came clean and told me all the details, some more graphic about the sexual part of her affairs than I ever would have credited my very straight laced and seemingly.prudish wife capable of ok. However keep in mind that most of this occurred over 40 years ago and she has genuinely forgotten big parts of the relationship she enjoyed with the first and principal AP a surgeon at the hospital of her employment Except for how stingy he wss when it came to sharing gifts. Although she admits to having bought him a tie a silver money clip, a Parker gold Parker pen to write out prescriptions and a pommade for his unruly hair, he hardly gave her anything and in the choice of gifts demonstrated that he really didn't know or appreciate her at all. I recall very well the bizarre cheap earrings he bought for her birthday, they looked like little bird cages with a tiny bird inside.She wore them.one day and then I never saw them again.He took her to Denny's and IHOP once each, and to a Roadhouse bar once during a 15 month long affair. Such largesse from a mature man, secure in his profession making in 1972 the equivalent in today's money, of $850,000 per annum. It wss a very.lopsided affair in which she fell in love with the AP and as far as my wife was concerned she was an easy side piece for sexual relief after a long day of surgery for whom he never used her first name, always calling her nurse Vocalion.So gifts can be a very accurate barometer of the state of the affair. The AP tried to.lure her back, but my wife finally realized the terrible nature of her actions, but wss too scared by then to confess, although she did seek psychiatric help unbeknownst to me, and soon afterwards asked me to join her in renewing our vows at the new church we had begun attending.Later when my son, AP's biological child) began college, he mailed him a green shaded study lamp but thankfully never in any other way tried to contact my son, although he wrote to my wife about a dozen letters over three or four decades. However, by then she was completely inured to his efforts at reconnecting.

When she says you're the only one she'll ever love, and you find out, that you're not the one she's thinking of,That's when you're learning the game.Charles Hardin ( Buddy) Holly...December 1958

posts: 373   ·   registered: Feb. 22nd, 2023   ·   location: San Diego
id 8852279
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The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 5:49 PM on Sunday, October 27th, 2024

Lying to protect somebody's feelings is still lying especially during reconciliation. A husband flew back into town early, went to a hotel and what, paid cash? I call BS. Why lie at this point? His wife already knows that he stayed at the AP's house because the AP told her.

I just decided to move on because it was not worth it to try to get him to admit something. And I really don’t need him to admit anything anyway.

I know who I married. At least I can say I know the REAL person.

Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 11 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.

posts: 14242   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2017
id 8852312
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