My sister in law gave him a time line, gave him passwords , offered to do counseling, asked for marriage counseling , did nothing but stay at home and take care of the kids while he went and got revenge by having emotional affairs while on the road, three that he has admitted to. He now has a girl staying in the same hotel that he tells her "she deserves this".
Does this happen often, no I didn’t say that, I am speaking from what I’ve seen.
He has also admitted to me he didn’t do the work with her to heal but stayed married thinking it would magically resolve itself and choose to have victim mentality… because in his mind he can hold all of the cards.
I am not defending her, what she did was horrible, but she’s changed and I’ve seen it with my own eyes. So has he , but he doesn’t care.
I didn’t think all of that was relevant to the original question so I left it all out.
We all have a choice to ask what we need then leave or stay , we as betrayed spouses have a responsibility to heal and leave or heal and stay. That was my point of explaining their situation.
[This message edited by Groot1988 at 1:46 AM, Monday, November 11th]
Married 5 years (together 11) Four children Me Bs 36Him WH 35- 4 month PA Dday Oct 6- lots of TT final disclosure Jan 16.
"If we walk through hell we might as well hold hands, we should make this a home"- citizen soldier
