Topic is Sleeping.
15yrsinthemaking (original poster member #75828) posted at 5:03 AM on Wednesday, December 30th, 2020
My timeline is from 15 years ago, I don't have dates but I gave all the information I can dig up. I searched through scrapbook/journals.
Do I add how I was feeling during certain times or do I just leave that part out and just put the actions?
I want to do this right...
Bulcy ( member #74034) posted at 9:19 AM on Wednesday, December 30th, 2020
The simple answer is “it depends”. It depends on what your BS wants, it depends on who the time line is for, it depends on what you want to get from it, it depends on the honesty in the detail.
My opinion would be to add the feelings, add the justifications, add the your thoughts now about how you felt then. My timeline has been updated multiple times over the last couple of years. I’m now looking into justifications I was using to promote the affairs. My BS and I are using the timeline as a discussion document and I am using it to help me understand the why’s. It’s a long process but valuable for both of you.
Maybe your bs only wants basic details? I would still recommend that you complete the full timeline even if only for yourself!, though it is, in my opinion, worth sharing this as part of recovery.
WH (50's)
Multiple sexual, emotional and online affairs. Financial infidelity and emotional abuse. Physical abuse and intimidation.
D-days 2003, 2017, multiple d-days and TT through 2018 to 2023. 28 years of destructive and health damaging choice
BraveSirRobin ( member #69242) posted at 3:03 PM on Wednesday, December 30th, 2020
It worked better for us to have a timeline that was dry in its delivery of the facts. I told my BH when I gave it to him that my mind was racing with sidebars and explanations while writing it, but I was afraid that would come across as excuses. I was more than willing to discuss what I was thinking and feeling at any point that he wanted to ask, but I avoided unsolicited commentary.
Topic is Sleeping.
