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Y'all I'm here whining again and I'm sorry. I've been holding it all, trying to keep all the plates up in the air but today just did me in.

JM was hospitalized in October after not sleeping for a week or more. Since then he hasn't been able to work consistently. He has a woodshop and has been trying to get a business started. But he has a hard time being alone in the shop. He has been doing EMDR since before the hospital stay. His daytime symptoms have improved a lot but his nightmares have gotten worse. He has rage attacks (never at or around me). But that scares me for his safety as well as others'. Anyway, he is starting IV ketamine on Monday and our church is paying for it. So that's a really good thing, wrapped up in a whole bunch of hard shit.

I have recovered well from my surgery but have had a series of other issues. I tore a gastroc muscle in the leg I didn't have surgery on. Then I've started having pain in my right upper side and stomach. So far, I know it's not a kidney stone, not diverticulitis, not appendicitis, not ulcers, not a residual gallstones (had GB out in 2005) not pancreatitis. Still no ideas what it is after 2 urgent care visits, PCP and GI visits, EGD, CT scan and MRI and MRCP. I'm so tired of feeling bad.

I have a FT job and a PT job and our house is in foreclosure. Turns out we may qualify for help from a homeowner rescue program. So... Yay? Hopefully.? I can't even think about it right now.

Because today I had to stand beside my son as we said goodbye to his dog, Buddy. DS is 24 and Buddy was his first dog. We rescued him from a shelter with less than 24 hours left. He survived getting into rat poison a year after we got him. He helped pull my DS through some tough, tough times. As I was driving to the vet I remembered my Daddy making that same drive with me when I wasn't much younger than DS is. My dog wasn't too old but was suffering. My parents let me make the decision and didn't push me. We did the same with DS. And damn, it hurt. I realize how Daddy must have felt.

Just been a really hard day, week, month. Year.

Life.

(((((Hugs))))). you have so much difficult stuff going on. No wonder you are exhausted. I am glad JM is getting the ketamine — I did similar treatments and they were very helpful for me. And I hope they get to the bottom of your pain— that is so scary and frustrating.

I hope you are able to get help to keep your home. Keep taking care of yourself. You are not whining. You really are carrying a Herculean load and have been for a while.

(((((HFSSC)))))

Hugs my dear. I'm so sorry you're going through so much. Prayers that the reason for your pain is found and an easy fix.

I'm so thankful your church is helping JM. That's beautiful.

Losing a pet is never easy and being with your son through the process with everything going on makes you a truely loving person.

Chin up. There's a plan in place and all will be ok. ❤️

Not whining - these are real problems. Sending mojo and wishing you and JM the best.

((((HFSSC))))

Sorry you are having such a rough go of things.
I hope the ketamine helps, I hear great things about it, and other psychedelic's for treating trauma, and PTSD/Depression.

Hang in there sweet lady.

Not whining AT ALL... you've had a rough go of it! Thinking of you all.

So sorry you're having such a tough time. Prayers that things ease up.

Good heavens…so much to deal with.

🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

If you can't complain and kvetch over that run of bad luck, when can you? Seriously!

I've torn both gastrocs, on two different occasions (playing weekend warrior). It's really painful, but it will get better with rest and time. I was on crutches both times for about a week to ten days.

Well I’m still riding the shit wave here.

Saw my PCP last Wednesday am. Same day at work, I started with a dry, persistent cough and no other symptoms. We’re still hyper-aware of COVID at work (nursing home) so I tested myself morning and night…all negative. The cough continued and Friday it was almost constant and I decided I probably should see somebody. Ended up in urgent care and was taken straight back to a room for a breathing treatment. Never had one of those before, although I’ve probably given a hundred or more. Then I got IV steroids, which was also a new experience. They did rapid test which was negative for COVID, flu and RSV. The complete panel takes about a day to come back. So Saturday I get a call that I have Human Metapneumovirus. It’s related to RSV. Nobody seems to know how long it’s contagious. Symptoms might last a week, might last 4-6 weeks. It’s the worst cough I’ve ever had including the times I had COVID.

I’m gonna burn sage, prayer walk my house and maybe have an exorcism.

Well no one had that on their 2023 Bingo card. Yikes.
Take good care of you — that cough sounds miserable.

I hope you are on the "quick mend" side of this.

Sending healing mojo….

Rest and take care of yourself. Prayers for a quick recovery.

(((HFSSC)))

Hope you are starting to feel a little more human.

So Saturday I get a call that I have Human Metapneumovirus.

My grandson gave me that gift back in January. It sucked. It took me several weeks to feel 100% again - sorry to tell you this. There were times where I felt like I should have gone in to get a breathing treatment, but I didn't. Don't know why I didn't.