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Have y'all heard it yet?

She's warning Jolene, not begging her.

It's also a terrific R anthem.

[This message edited by SacredSoul33 at 11:58 PM, Friday, March 29th]

I didn't even know she had a version of Jolene. Just listened to it on YouTube and couldn't stop grinning. Now that's a version I can get behind. Every wanna be OW should hear it.

I like Lemonade, and there are some great songs there.

I don't know. Something about her version of Jolene rubs me the wrong way considering her story and everything. Even with the intro. I get that she is an artist and I'm maybe not allowed to say bad things about her interpretation. It feels almost too rebellious/triumphant/performative. I can't find the right word. It doesn't feel like a real and authentic R anthem to me.

Maybe it's just because I'm a man and don't quite get it.

EDIT: She is warning a potential (or in her case real) AP. It's her husband though right. Her husband should be the one not cheating. Jolene, the AP, shouldn't be worth this effort. You don't warn the AP, because the man, her man should know better now. Right? I just don't like it.

[This message edited by This0is0Fine at 12:16 AM, Saturday, March 30th]

This song is for women. Always has been, always will be.

I get it. I feel it. I love it. I don’t have much interest in picking it apart and shoulding on it. It’s raw and real and I respect that she had the guts to put it out there.

————————————-

Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene

I’m warning you, don’t come for my man

Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene

Don’t take the chance because you think you can

You’re beautiful beyond compare

Takes more than beauty and seductive stares

To come between a family and a happy man

Jolene, I’m a woman too

Thе games you play are nothing new

So you don’t want no hеat with me, Jolene

We’ve been deep in love for 20 years

I raised that man, I raised his kids

I know my man better than he knows himself (what)

I can easily understand why you’re attracted to my man

But you don’t want this smoke, so shoot your shot with someone else (you heard me)

Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene

I’m warning you, woman, find you your own man

Jolene, I know I’m a queen, Jolene

I’m still a Creole banjee bitch from Louisianne (don’t try me)

There’s a thousand girls in every room

That act as desperate as you do

You a bird, go on and sing your tune, Jolene (what)

I had to have this talk with you

‘Cause I hate to have to act a fool

Your peace depends on how you move, Jolene

Me and my man crossed those valleys

Highs and lows and everything between

You did roll in like tumbling weeds

I sleep good happy, ’cause you can’t dig up our planted seeds

I know my man’s gonna stand by me breathing in my gentle breeze

I crossed those valleys

Highs and lows and everything between

Good deeds roll in like tumbling weeds

Good and happy, ’cause you can’t dig up them planted seeds

Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene

I’ma stand by her, she gon’ stand by me, Jolene

I’ma stand by him, he gon’ stand by me

I’ma stand by her, she gon’ stand by me

I’ma stand by him, he gon’ stand by me, Jolene

SacredSoul33...thanks for posting the lyrics . I had heard that she had done that song...and I had no desire to hear it...until I read your lyrics. Then I went and looked it up and listened to it...pretty cool !

You don't warn the AP, because the man, her man should know better now. Right?

RIGHT!!! In MY case it was an adultery co-conspirator. On Dday...my H sent the NC message to the adultery co-conspirator. BUT...she didn't abide by it . At first we both tried just ignoring her attempts at contacting my H. After 5 MONTHS of her harassing him...every 2-3 weeks when SHE wanted...that was when I HAD ENOUGH!!

I really TRIED to listen to what the vets on here advised and not give in to those attempts of hers...but they hindered my healing. I was TIRED of waiting for the next attempt...and I wanted it to end on MY terms! My H held true to his end and has never contacted the adultery co-conspirator after he sent the NC message...but it didn't mean I couldn't ! I didn't warn her though that there would be consequences if she kept things up...I promised her there would be . I let her know that TWO could play at this harassing game and I WOULD WIN . It worked! It has been over 9 1/2 years now and we haven't heard a peep from her since .

I didn't even know she had a version of Jolene.

Just dropped yesterday!

My H held true to his end and has never contacted the adultery co-conspirator after he sent the NC message...but it didn't mean I couldn't

Exactly!

I like that Bey took Dolly’s classic (with her blessing; she did the intro) and presented another aspect of BW emotions.

Full disclosure: Lemonade was absolutely the album I played on repeat post d-day, and I love Beyonce so I was primed to like this.

I’ve always loved the original Jolene as a song - it’s sincere and vulnerable and scared and beautiful……BUT…. no part of me has ever identified with the song as a BS. It’s funny, it’s kind of well known as an anthem to the OW (I’m not sure I can even think of another song written to the OW) but… "my happiness depends on you," is not a lyric I identify with. "I raised that man, I raised his kids" on the other hand…..

I agree that it changes the vibe of the song. I’m okay with that. There’s room for both versions. The original feels like it’s from the perspective of a woman who is scared her spouse is cheating (and is helpless to do anything about it), the second (we know) is from the perspective of someone who knows her husband cheated, has come out the other side of it, and is telling the OW to kick rocks.

[This message edited by emergent8 at 2:58 AM, Sunday, March 31st]

"my happiness depends on you," is not a lyric I identify with. "I raised that man, I raised his kids" on the other hand…..

Right?? I never felt Dolly’s version either. (ETA I always liked it, but it’s not how I think.) Loretta’s "You Ain’t Woman Enough" was more in line with how I felt.

Jolene, I know I’m a queen, Jolene

That gave me chills.

[This message edited by SacredSoul33 at 12:13 AM, Sunday, March 31st]

I love and feel Dolly’s original and love and feel Beyoncé’s cover. I really like the layering of the different emotional experiences of each version.

dolly’s original is an easier fit for my general emotional orientation (probably because I grew up a poor white girl from dolly’s neck of the woods), but I aspire to Beyoncé’s.

[This message edited by Grieving at 11:14 PM, Saturday, March 30th]

Lord, that "I raised that man I raised his kids" line. 🙌🙌🙌

I think I’ve recommended this song on here before, but Tanya Tucker’s "I Don’t Owe You Anything" is 🔥🔥🔥.

I think I’ve recommended this song on here before, but Tanya Tucker’s "I Don’t Owe You Anything" is 🔥

Just listened. I LOVE IT.

Catchy tune. Personally, I've always thought it's pathetic to go after the OW/OM. I RAGED after Dday, but that burning murderous rage was ALL for my husband, now ex. I grew up watching my mother chasing after and fist fighting all of the OW my step-dad had every time she found out about a new A. I swore I'd never be as pathetic as her. Anytime you go after the AP, you've already made yourself pathetic. They are so beneath acknowledgement. I thought Shrek was dirty AF, but there will always be dirty people. It was up to my then husband to keep his dick clean. No way I'd ever lower myself to acknowledging trash. Each to their own, though. JMHO.

I don’t think it’s usually productive or the best path toward healing to blame or confront or focus on the AP.

I’m also not sure it’s helpful to write them off as trash—I’d rather not do that with anyone, even the woman who had sex with my husband and had zero regard for my well being or agency.

For me, placing primary responsibility and focus on my husband doesn’t keep me from acknowledging the co-responsibility of his AP. Valuing her as human instead of dismissing her as trash forces me to practice a core value of mine, but it also allows me to hold her to basic ethical standards that she violated, hurting me terribly in the process.

Affair partners harm spouses and families. They violate them. They break the basic moral norms of honesty and empathy that hold our communities and relationships together. Should they be our primary focus as betrayed spouses? Absolutely not. And do we need to be hyperaware of our inclination to misplace our anger and blame on them? Certainly. But I’m not letting them off the hook for the wrong they do by dismissing them as trash.

Sorry, I don't like the guns in the video. But she has a great voice.

She sent my husband an email basically begging to come be his secretary even though she would be leaving a higher paying job. I read the email.

Later there were texts showing her going after him. Then after No Contact she stalked.

My husband is horrified at what he did to the OBS. My husbands married AP was angry at me for breaking up her fun.

I have plenty of anger at my husband and he has had to make amends.

But my anger at the OW is based on facts (VAR recordings emails and texts) all showing her as the aggressor and him as the complete fool.

So yes I like this song. I have no embarrassment about holding this piece of trash accountable.

Happily she got fired twice from the same job for her misbehavior and both my husband and I played a part in that. I am happy for that revenge.

Love Beyoncé

Not a fan of Beyonce [nothing against her personally - I am just a punk rock girl at heart].

BUT if recording this song made that woman feel a bit more Bad Ass and Bullet Proof - sparkly hats off to her.

ETA - It does make me wonder if that idiot husband of hers has been at it again. Or if the "good haired girl" never really went all the way away...

[This message edited by Chaos at 3:02 PM, Monday, April 1st]

Not a fan of Beyonce [nothing against her personally - I am just a punk rock girl at heart]

Same. I 100% recognize the talent, but most of her music isn't my cup of tea. Jolene, however... GET IT, GIRL.

ETA - It does make me wonder if that idiot husband of hers has been at it again. Or if the "good haired girl" never really went all the way away...

My take is that she's either still pissed at Becky(s) with the Good Hair; she wrote this a while ago; or that she's annoyed by the attention Jay-Z gets from women since he's a celebrity.

I hadn't seen the video until this morning. They're channeling Bonnie and Clyde. In it together until the end.

I get irritated when people tell BSs that they should focus all of their anger on the WS and not the AP. Here's a cool little trick I learned on TikTok of all places about "shoulding" on oneself: Do I want to? Do I need to? If the answer to both of those is "no" then "should" does not apply. One could argue that "need" applies, but I don't think so. Why do I need to NOT be angry with the AP? I don't.

"I get irritated when people tell BSs that they should focus all of their anger on the WS and not the AP".

I have never understood this. If focusing all your anger on the WS works for you, great. If somebody else is helped by expressing anger towards the AP, assuming they are not putting the blame on them and not the WS, that's ok too.

Everybody is different and as similar as our situations are the same the are also different. Our paths to healing are our own.

I personally see nothing wrong with feeling anger towards the person that participated in destroying your life. At the same time if someone wants to focus all their anger on their spouse and that works for them there is nothing wrong with that either.

I listened to the whole album and liked it, but when I heard Dolly talking about "that hussy with the good hair you sang about," I thought

My take is that she's either still pissed at Becky(s) with the Good Hair;

Man, I hate to see whoever she is feeling SO powerful and important to Beyonce. Beyonce! Still talking about her? Hating on her all these years later? Rewriting the lyrics to 'Jolene'? Beyonce sounds so threatened. Talk about feeling like you are really hot sh$t in this world because you can get Beyonce so...focused on you and your "good hair," singing to you. Cringe. Geeze. I bet this Becky is strutting around and flipping her hair all over.

I hate seeing Beyonce give her power away like that. The opposite of mattering is, "I'm sorry, but who are you again???? No recollection."

[This message edited by OwningItNow at 8:06 PM, Monday, April 1st]