AdLarue17 (original poster member #84917) posted at 12:00 AM on Monday, September 21st, 2026
Well folks, I made it through the worst summer of my life. As we got closer to our divorce being final, things got harder and harder and my soon-to-be ex just got more and more selfish. I’m finally in my own place though with my youngest daughter. My oldest is settled into college and doing well. I’m back at work and hanging with my friends. A week ago I would have said I was doing really well.
Then he posted a picture of him and the AP on social media that said I love you. And of course, a "friend" called to tell me. It crushed me. Not because I want him back but because he never did stuff like that for me. I don’t think he even loved me. And why does he get to be happy and in love? My brain knows he not… he still texts me all the damn time saying he’s miserable and sorry. Why does it still hurt me that he did this?
To top it off, my mother is not speaking to me because I told her to stop bossing me around basically. I’ve been letting her for awhile because I’ve felt so broken but I needed her to back off and boy did she ever. Says she may never speak to me again.
And my 14 year old, she’s the meanest kid on the planet right now. She is angry and she takes it all out on me.
I just want to be ok. I wish I could forget him.
BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 2:31 AM on Monday, September 21st, 2026
AdL,
Glad to hear you have your own place now. Tell the friend to keep that stuff to herself, and I would question why she sees his posts.
You don’t need to see/hear/know about any of that. I told our mutual friends that I had no interest in hearing about what is going on in his life - i t was no longer any of my business or my interest. And please remember that Facebook is known as FakeBook for a reason. And words like that are cheap. There’s no depth there. It’s all a show, a play. You know that he has not changed - she’s getting your damaged leftovers.
As for your daughter- teen years are tough. And she lashes at you because she knows you are the safe parent. No advice, but she will outgrow it. Is she in IC? Might help. (Might not- teens are tough!!)
Keep doing what you are doing. Moving forward, building a life. When he pops in your head, acknowledge it and "turn the channel". Takes practice and time, but you will think of him less and less over time. I 100% didn’t want my XWS back but it still took time and more than a few tears to get through it.
Hang in there. You really doing great. 💪
Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)
**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **
Superesse ( member #60731) posted at 5:02 AM on Monday, September 21st, 2026
Yes, I second the encouragement, you are doing GREAT!
I too had to tell my mother to back off during my divorce and she stopped communicating with me, for about 3 months...I broke the ice by sending her a simple Mother's Day card. She later apologized and admitted she was just doing to me what her mother had done to her. (I was seeing an IC and the IC said I was "enmeshed" with my mother and needed to stop letting her boss me like she was used to doing (I was 30 years old!) This too will pass...
Leeleelu ( new member #87698) posted at 6:49 AM on Monday, September 21st, 2026
Ad, hugs to you and I wish you peace in your healing journey. It sounds like you are doing your best to take care of yourself. I would establish some boundaries with your friends such as "if you see him or what he posts , I’d rather not know". I don’t think he is truly in love. But even if he was , you deserve someone better than him. You are the focus of your life now . Keep taking care of yourself and doing the things that make you feel good, even when it’s hard. One day you will wake up and feel less emotionally attached to it . All we can do is keep going until we get to that point.
