STBXH ( member #60824) posted at 8:41 AM on Monday, August 6th, 2018
BH (me) 40 something
WW same
DD 12 DS 9
“The person that can fuck someone else, gaslight and lie to your face about it, is the very same person that cannot understand the soul crushing devastation you face at the revelation of their actions.” —me
STBXH ( member #60824) posted at 9:28 AM on Monday, August 6th, 2018
The previous was from me! Betrayed menz....
But I also like this from Adlham -
I would fantasize during some of my classes in nursing school because I learned all sorts of interesting ways to make it look like natural causes.
Lol the AP murder fantasies are quite hilarious at times...
BH (me) 40 something
WW same
DD 12 DS 9
“The person that can fuck someone else, gaslight and lie to your face about it, is the very same person that cannot understand the soul crushing devastation you face at the revelation of their actions.” —me
Cephastion ( member #51990) posted at 12:02 PM on Monday, August 6th, 2018
Well that's sure ONE way to help get me to cut back on coffee with cream and sugar in it...
And maybe breakfast links as well...
And hot dogs...
Which inspired me to think that "two's a company, but three's a kraut"
But another breakfast ruining one I actually heard from here is an awful mental picture/expression that really honestly HAS affected my ability to eat oatmeal, which is...no...I better not really...nevermind...some things are better left unsaid I suppose. 
[This message edited by Cephastion at 6:17 AM, August 6th (Monday)]
BH-me / WW-(Pyrite)
Left Thanksgiving 2019 w/ unresolved childhood trauma and other general selfishness issues that she refuses to honestly address, resolve,& heal from.--"For where your wealth/treasure is, there will your heart be also."--Yeshua
STBXH ( member #60824) posted at 7:35 PM on Monday, August 6th, 2018
Ceph breakfast, apparently, is full of landmines....and lunch as well. Dinner? Now would be a good time to lose weight anyway 
BH (me) 40 something
WW same
DD 12 DS 9
“The person that can fuck someone else, gaslight and lie to your face about it, is the very same person that cannot understand the soul crushing devastation you face at the revelation of their actions.” —me
Jada4Max ( member #43987) posted at 6:00 PM on Monday, September 3rd, 2018
XWW: We're just friends.
Me: I saw you dry humping him on his porch before y'all went inside.
XWW: it wasn't like that. He was sad about something. I was comforting him.
Me: oh, so you gave him a vagina to lean on?
Priceless response from GoldenR in the General Forum.
[This message edited by Jada4Max at 12:02 PM, September 3rd, 2018 (Monday)]
wifehad5 ( Administrator #15162) posted at 9:43 PM on Wednesday, January 9th, 2019
FBH - 52 FWW - 53 (BrokenRoad)2 kids 17 & 22The people you do your life with shape the life you live
Cephastion ( member #51990) posted at 10:30 PM on Wednesday, January 9th, 2019
Rideitout (RIO) posted this profound paradox referring to the fiction vs. reality of some peoples' "wanting to feel special" motives for adultery:
They'll blow their lives apart for sex with someone new, but that "someone new" is literally 1/2 the population of the world. <sigh>
If that wasn't true enough for the reader, it was preceded by this statement:
Of course it was about sex and of course he said whatever he thought would get you to take your underwear off the fastest, that's why people have affairs! If that wasn't on offer in an A, I can promise you, I don't know a single man who'd blow his life apart to hear a woman say "wow, RIO, your such a great guy, your wife is lucky".
I know what you meant there, RIO but I have to admit that your argument here in it's literal form is truly incontestable!
BH-me / WW-(Pyrite)
Left Thanksgiving 2019 w/ unresolved childhood trauma and other general selfishness issues that she refuses to honestly address, resolve,& heal from.--"For where your wealth/treasure is, there will your heart be also."--Yeshua
HeHadADoubleLife ( member #68944) posted at 1:34 AM on Thursday, February 21st, 2019
OwningItNow has had a lot of gems lately.
In response to a post re: misunderstanding infidelity, someone said we need to view infidelity as abuse. OIN brings up the way codependency relates
If infidelity is abuse, then why are you staying with your abuser?
You, like anybody in a shitty relationship, have choices. It doesn't matter that you don't like your options, you still have them. So take control over your life rather than focusing on what the rest of the world should do or not do.
Dropping knowledge bombs.
BW
DDay Nov 2018
Many previous DDays due to his sex addiction
Hurt me with the truth, but don't comfort me with a lie.
Love is never wasted, for its value does not rest upon reciprocity.
twisted ( member #8873) posted at 3:14 PM on Tuesday, March 5th, 2019
AbandonedGuy is the What signs did you notice thread:
My gut was "Hello, McFly"-ing my brain so hard.
"Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
BetrayedPR77 ( member #69207) posted at 8:55 PM on Friday, May 3rd, 2019
These two gems are the fresh ones from a reliability vs passion thread on General:
Notherngal explaining where the passion could begin:
foreplay starts at the coffee maker
And after that, Domestic Tourist naming it:
It’s called “choreplay” fellas and it leads to foreplay and foreplay leads to, well, I hope you can take it from here.
Me- BH (b. 1977)
She - WW (b. 1981)
Together since 2001, married in 2005
LTA - 7 years - Double Betrayal
DDay - 10/03/2018
DDay 2 - 01/05/2019 (learn the true length of the A)
"Not my circus, not my monkeys"
Status: Next stop: Divo
BetrayedPR77 ( member #69207) posted at 1:00 AM on Tuesday, May 7th, 2019
And this one is from LivingWithPain in a thread on General (that maybe will be moved to Off-Topic) about a SI user getting a dog:
Dogs are too needy.
Cats teach you not to be codependent.
[This message edited by BetrayedPR77 at 7:01 PM, May 6th (Monday)]
Me- BH (b. 1977)
She - WW (b. 1981)
Together since 2001, married in 2005
LTA - 7 years - Double Betrayal
DDay - 10/03/2018
DDay 2 - 01/05/2019 (learn the true length of the A)
"Not my circus, not my monkeys"
Status: Next stop: Divo
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 4:27 PM on Monday, May 13th, 2019
From homewrecked2011:
“It’s ok to cry when you’re hurt. It’s also ok to smash things. But wash your face, clean your mess, and get up off the floor when you’re done. You don’t belong down there.”
Author unknown.
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
Pippin ( member #66219) posted at 4:20 PM on Wednesday, May 15th, 2019
Oh I am so so so glad to find this thread.
Ibonnie wrote:
Is no one else the slighest bit concerned that when the OP had an appointment to meet with a laywer, he thinks his wayward wife SET FIRE TO THEIR HOUSE, which ended up causing structural damage and requiring insurance to step in and set them up in a hotel!?!?!?!
It was a misunderstanding and the wayward wife definitely did not commit arson in a misguided attempt to prevent her husband from seeing the lawyer.
But ibonnie's earnest concern, expressed through bold, italics, all caps AND a couple of hasty typos, that the responders were missing the forest for the trees had me laughing for hours. My husband said it was pent-up demand for SI humor.
Possible responses which I did not post: My cheater's handbook says that slashing his tires would be easier and also preserve assets in the case of divorce.
And please have your wayward wife consider these usernames if she signs up: Danyeris, Carrie, Mrs. Rochester. Personally my vote is for Melisandre because she seems beautiful but is in reality an incomprehensible witch who uses sex to leech innocent trusting men and really ugly when she takes off her clothes/necklace, so something for everyone.
(Quote posted with ibonnie's blessing)
[This message edited by Pippin at 10:23 AM, May 15th (Wednesday)]
Him: Shadowfax1
Reconciled for 6 years
Dona nobis pacem
HoldingTogether ( member #29429) posted at 10:04 PM on Saturday, May 18th, 2019
What everyone here is trying to explain is that this doesn't get solved by you figuring out how to get him up off the floor. You need to get down on the floor with him
BraveSirRobin with maybe one of the best descriptions of a Waywards work that I have seen.
Us-Reconciled.
You keep waiting for the dust to settle, and then, one day you realize... This is it, that dust is your life going on around you.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 6:26 PM on Wednesday, April 29th, 2020
In retrospect there were fewer Red Flags in China than in my relationship.
RunningLowNow in a thread on 'The most ridiculous excuse to come out of their mouth'
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
LadyG ( member #74337) posted at 3:07 AM on Monday, May 4th, 2020
As a side note, my autocorrect keeps wanting to replace "slut" with "slur". My iPad obviously hasn't been paying attention to my life!
Try the word Slurry... the Urban Dictionary meaning may have you rethink ever using that word again... 🙏🏼
September 26 1987 I married a monster. Slowly healing from Complex PTSD. I Need Peace. Fiat Lux. Buddha’s Love Saves Me 🙏🏼
WhatsRight ( member #35417) posted at 10:31 PM on Thursday, June 4th, 2020
From a thread asking the question, “Why won’t he admit it?“
BentandBroken...
I'll take "Things A Lying, Cheating, Cowardly Asshole Does" for 400.
AND, from Justsomeguy:
Um, asshole maybe? Just spitballing here.
[This message edited by WhatsRight at 4:34 PM, June 4th (Thursday)]
"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt
I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 6:06 PM on Saturday, July 18th, 2020
GiggleLoopMayor on page 19 of https://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=647452&AP=361&HL=:
Too me you look at the entirety of most affairs and an AP isnt an alpha, hes a scavenger.
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
BraveSirRobin ( member #69242) posted at 11:30 PM on Sunday, August 9th, 2020
Anger has its place, as does hurt. And both need to be processed in order to heal and move forward. I think a big part of the problem that some people have is the tendency to stay in the anger as a mechanism for avoiding the hurt.
HoldingTogether in "Burn the Witch," a thread discussing harsh posts to new arrivals in JFO
Want2BHappyAgain ( member #45088) posted at 3:46 PM on Friday, October 2nd, 2020
Never play chess with a pigeon. The pigeon just knocks all the pieces over. Then shits all over the board and struts around like it won.
Sanibelredfish in the "It feels like she's won." thread by ColdChickenNugge in the General Forum.
A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.
With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)
I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!
From respect comes great love...sassylee
