Topic is Sleeping.
Naturelover (original poster member #50419) posted at 9:08 PM on Friday, February 26th, 2016
Anyone read this? I'm finding it quite eye opening.
cantaccept ( member #37451) posted at 10:01 PM on Friday, February 26th, 2016
I a have read it. I think it might have been almost year ago now.
It was quite eye opening. It helped to answer some of the questions that I had about how his anger and abuse benefited him.
It still doesn't quite make sense to me. Maybe time for a reread. It was almost too much to digest at one reading.
If anyone is questioning whether they are being abused this is one of my go to books to recommend.
"I'm still standing better than I ever did. Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid" Elton John
I would now like to be known as Can!
dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh deleted
I attempted R, he was a lie
Chrysalis123 ( member #27148) posted at 12:49 PM on Sunday, February 28th, 2016
This is a go to book for me. It was one of the first resources that helped me "SEE" that I had allowed myself to be manipulated and emotionally abused.
Someone I once loved gave me/ a box full of darkness/ It took me years to understand/ That this, too, was a gift. - Mary Oliver
Just for the record darling, not all positive changes feel positive in the beginning -S C Lourie
Itstime ( member #45679) posted at 9:18 PM on Monday, March 7th, 2016
Thank you for recommending the book. It was a quite eye opening and scary how accurate the author was. My STBX will probably denies or would never admit to himself that he was emotionally abusive but he fits in couple of the abusers.
I found this review and this is exactly what I felt, my STBX was perpetually angry, most of the time with me and I walked in eggshells through out our marriage. He was controlling, a type A personality, Be little me, spit on me, treated me like I'm a child, tried to throw me out, punched a wall because he can't get through me, yelled at me in a very intimidating manner and cheated on me worse way, the disrespect I felt before the A, transcend to how he cheated on me but he never abuse me physically, just painful emotional abuse. I am sure he thinks I abuse him emotionally too but compare to what he has done, mine is nothing to compare to what he has done to me.
I recommend it to anyone who lives with a perpetually angry spouse or if you feel you have to walk on eggshells all the time. Maybe you have morphed into a different person just to please your spouse or have learned how to do and not do certain things to keep the peace in the relationship. The chapter on all the different types of abusers is EYE OPENING for anyone. I personally believe most people don't know how subtle abuse really is and how damaging just a small amount consistently expressed is to the victim's psyche.
[This message edited by Itstime at 4:25 PM, March 7th (Monday)]
DDay-11/17/14
DDay 2 - 7/1/18
DS - 11 and 9, DD - 5
Status -divorce
" You don't fuck a woman you barely met over the internet in your marital bed while your small children were only few steps away"
bbyg98 ( member #51580) posted at 7:31 AM on Thursday, March 24th, 2016
it was kind of a tedious read to me
I ripped off the bandaid and I am free at last! :) Thank god & SI😋
TS68 ( member #40211) posted at 4:19 PM on Saturday, March 26th, 2016
Omg I thought this was an amazing book!! Amazing book with a really dumb title!! Anyone who has been abused physical or not would benefit from this excellent book.
Me: 48
Him: 50
Married 22 years too many
DS19, DS17, DD10
Divorced
Know your worth.
Topic is Sleeping.
