SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

OP- in the future here is how you can say no.

“Sorry, I can’t I need to go to the bank/pharmacy.”

“I prefer to drive alone. I need a break from conversation.”

“I promised my wife I would call her and this will be my only downtime. Sorry!”

“Sorry, I can’t. I need to make a personal call right now.”

Practice your favorites. Think up future scenarios where you might be asked to break an agreement and come up with refusals and discuss them with your wife. If you are focused on her you will be able to find some sayings that do not embarrass her OR break the agreement.

As to the BG rule, it’s a fine decision to make IF a man is an individual contributor in their company OR they run a business and can make all of the rules so that the rule is “No one on one meetings between any two people” Otherwise the rule does not afford women in the organization the same opportunities as men.

I work in a male dominated field. My bosses are all men as are many of my coworkers. Our company values mentoring as a way to level up. It also requires managers to meet 1:1 with their reports once a week. If my manager were to follow the BG rule, I would miss out on many opportunities.

I have been hit in a meeting and it made me uncomfortable. It was during a 1:1 with a former manager that was held not in a private room but at a table in a common area with other women within sight and people bustling around. I went straight to HR of course, but the idea that never being in a space alone at work will prevent harassment is proven not super effective in my case.

Also I had a male doctor a few years ago and he didn’t come in the room with a nurse. The nurse would come in first take my weight and blood pressure then leave and my doctor came in later. Also my dentist is a man and the hygienist definitely isn’t always there at the beginning of every appointment (they come in as needed depending on the procedure). 🤔 I wonder if that’s just a policy at individual practices.