So, I posted a few months ago here under "Separated and Hating it" if you want context on my life. Long story short: XWW had an eight month affair, lied about it for two years, and I got to find out from a stranger. I proceeded to separate pretty immediately and it felt rough. I wanted to post an update for the folks who were kind enough to commiserate and offer guidance in my previous posts.
DDay was four months ago, and while I still have plenty of bad days, they have become less intense and less common than my good days, or at least, normal days. I'm officially divorced as of a couple weeks ago. We had a bunch of loose ends to tie up though, mixed names on various bank accounts and insurance policies, the last of which I wrapped up today. I have to say, it feels really really good to be done. I have followed most of the common advice here: NC except for logistics and staying focused on self care. I'm actually in better physical shape now than I have been in a while since I've been using exercise as a coping mechanism. Also I'm a lot more likely to be able to sleep if I'm physically beat.
I've also tried to get more into some hobbies where I can meet people and put in the effort to actually turn some work friends into normal friends. I'd say I've had mixed success, but in general, I wish I could have told myself 3 months ago that life could feel somewhat normal again, and that it wouldn't take years. I think probably this has been a bit easier for me than for a lot of posters here because I'm relatively young (32) and have no kids with XWW. So if you are a new member reading my post, take my thoughts with a grain of salt, your mileage will vary.
The only place where I have not followed the guidance here is I have been seeing someone new for a few weeks 
. I'm prepared for that to to turn out to be a mistake, but I've been very up front with her about my situation and my desire to keep things light and casual, and she's been on board. She's also divorced (though not so recently) so I think that helps. I'm definitely not counting on that relationship to be long term or "fix" anything for me.
I don't have a clear goal with this post other than to say thanks to everyone who offered their support and advice in those dark early days. This thing has been a roller coaster, so I probably have some rough patches to navigate still, but things finally feel manageable. Even when I feel bad, I have the perspective of, well it's not as bad as I felt a few months ago. So anyway, thanks all. Cheers.
