SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

"I have been dating someone for two years now and I apologize for being controlling a lot and he is always like "what? You aren’t at all. Sharing your needs is not controlling."

having our reasonable needs met and agreements honored should be the norm..

Sending positive thoughts your way

I would send a positive upbeat reply and block him.

No drama- all the best for the future.

But congratulate yourself on calling out his shit and finding out he is a liar. You have saved yourself a future problem.

I do think dating apps seem to mean people keep shopping. Never satisfied. Always looking for something better. Consumerist dating. I guess the paid for apps don’t want you to find someone as you stop paying

Never be sad about a liar leaving.

So you found out he’s a fraud.

Good for you!

I’d choose to have no contact with him. Period.

He never was the person he pretended to be. Glad you found out now.

I could have written your post myself about two months ago. Similar situation but I got a little further into the relationship before it went pear shaped. Like you it was BOTH sides propelling the relationship until he suddenly hit a hurdle on his side (stress from work/kids) and pulled the plug. Due to how we met, I had made it very clear what my expectations were because we were intimate. I got fed a lot of weak reasons which make him seem incapable of handling stress and then it moved to blame shifting to me which is very narcissist. Then I spoke to the person he briefly dated before me (who I knew) and hear view mirrored by experiences. His initial break up sounds like the message from your man, but he did it in person.

What I learnt .... actions and words must match. Unfortunately, sometimes it takes time for that mismatch to come out.

I also think that the 'right' response if someone likes us, is to slow it down rather than run away.

With dating apps, multi dating is really considerable normal (even though its not my style). I basically have the 'chat' / expectation that if it progresses to sex than we will be exclusive at that point. I have that chat when it looks to be going that way.

We are highly sensitive to LIARS. It's not a bad thing. The problem is that we then discover there are a much small group of people out there who don't lie then we want to believe.

Sending healing hugs.

Late to this thread but sister count your blessings. This man is a sociopath. Seriously he was pushing for all that abd love bombing you giving you all the dopamine hits to suck you in.

Do NOT feel bad for calling him out on his shit. Congratulate yourself on identifying it early before he had convinced you to move in share bank accounts all that bs. Lesson learned.

Focus on you. Do things that make you happy and fulfilled and as you gain confidence and strength and the general DGAF attitude you will find yourself beating the men away.