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xpos is about to M for the 2nd time since DDay. W #1 died and the next one was already in the house, by her own admission. Guess this would really be wife #3.

This one is a doozy, lacks social skills and sadly believes she and I should be friends, forcing herself on my presence! I tried to get away from her at an event and she kept coming around me and touching me, all the while blabbing endlessly as if we were old pals. Says she could NEVER be in the same room as her ex - well, does she think I wanted to be around MY ex? Definitely NO!

And being around her was an added obstacle to my enjoyment of the event. xpos definitely does NOT want us to be "friends", because I would be forced to respond to many of her comments to correct them with the truth. I did say some things to her and she just laughed, grabbed my arm and shook it, apparently thinking I was kidding. As they left, she thanked me for "talking with her" (I didn't other than a few comments) and said we needed to "get together and talk again"! NOPE!

[This message edited by thebighurt at 4:10 AM, Tuesday, November 21st]

Oh, goodness. Maybe you can develop IBS and make a run for their own bathroom? Or something that would either allow you to escape or get you out of the situation?

You could be blunt and rip the bandage off and simply say that you won't be a friend to XWH and his spouse.

Is your ex nuts?!!? What did he marry? If this is who he chooses to live with you are soooo much better off away from him and his craziness.

Here is what you do. Ask her to repeat what she says over and over again until she has a Groundhog Day moment and leaves. By responding in a logical way you are giving her too much power. "What did you say?" "What did you say?" over and over and over.

Never let those creeps have the upper hand.

Leafields, I definitely plan to be blunt that we cannot be friends.

Is your ex nuts?!!? What did he marry? If this is who he chooses to live with you are soooo much better off away from him and his craziness.

Cooley2here, xpos is a covert, controlling narcissist who she will find out, as soon as the I do's are said, is also mentally, emotionally, and verbally abusive. Ne NEEDS the wedding to be soon, so he can be himself with her. Right now, he must be right on the edge, trying to not let it out.

Oh, he can be charming when he wants to make you think he is nice, but when he is comfortable to be himself, he is just abusive. I learned that when I started to challenge him and not do as I was told. That is when he decided he needed to find another "victim". That one was also a doozy. Twice my size, ugly and sick. According to "Why does he do that?", that is exactly the person he seeks, who is willing to be his victim. Someone who is "needy, insecure, and not very good looking" as Lundy Bancroft explains in the book. Boy, was she all of them! I learned a LOT from his great book!

And you are exactly right, Cooley2here, I am 1,000 times better off away from him!

OMG - the nerve of some people!!!

Wow, I commend you for keeping your composure. Just for the sake of manners in general she was rude. Talk about not knowing how to read a room, geez.

It almost sounded to me like a scene in a crazy, comical movie! Glad you can share here - we totally understand!

Thank you for the commendation, PinkJeepLady. Your comment about reading the room was exactly what my IC said about her inability to take cues from my reaction to her.

When she figured out who I was, she immediately ran toward me with her arms out as to hug me. I turned away from her and stuck my shoulder out between us. She told me her name and said she was a friend. Then, in a more intimate voice, said, "a VERY GOOD friend!". I just responded okay and walked away.

Later, she missed that I turned my back when she came and sat beside me and started babbling again. Also missed that I said "No!" as they were leaving when she said we needed to do it again. Also that I tried to extricate myself every time she grabbed or touched me.

It almost sounded to me like a scene in a crazy, comical movie!

Might have seemed like that to me, too, had I not been a part of it.

Maybe I'm too harsh but what's wrong is just saying Get the Hell away from me.

Seriously Jenniegirl, I agree but I think what thebighurt drove her crazy!!!

Keep us posted!

Maybe I'm too harsh but what's wrong is just saying Get the Hell away from me.

Do you think she would understand THAT??

Seriously Jenniegirl, I agree but I think what thebighurt drove her crazy!!!

Sadly, I may be forced to be around them again during the holidays.

[This message edited by thebighurt at 7:13 PM, Sunday, November 26th]