It was actually me that contacted her first. My H had no idea. I wanted her to know, after 20+ years of their sordid antics, that I now know and that I am now in control. It actually made me feel better to confront her and tell her what I think of her.
I’m almost definitely not contacting her again and will be blocking her on every level – I just needed to have my say with Her.
OK, I get it. If you wanted to have a last say with that pathetic excuse of a "woman", I understand. Im glad you're cutting her off like the cancer she is. Shes probably working on another schmuck like your WH as we type, and, in fact, may have multiple.
Moving on....
My sons do not know yet and I’m absolutely petrified about telling them, but I know that I have to. One of my sons is fragile, having suffered with his mental health in recent years. And has said that this Christmas is the first Christmas that he’s looking forward to since he was a child.
So I have already decided to keep playing happy families and not to tell them until the New Year.
The balancing act with kids is not easy. May I suggest that when you do explain to your more emotionally at-risk son, you do so with a therapist present? This can be beneficial for obvious reasons.
Sorry, forgot to say, family and friends that I have told are absolutely in shock. Never saw this coming and never thought him capable of doing it. Aways thought of him a a hard working family man who loved his family.
They are worried how I stay with him, get professional help and try to save our marriage. Must admit, I just don’t know but it’s only been 2 weeks since I found out so I know it’s very early days.
See, this is the way it is with charlatans. Others who have bought into their act are absolutely shocked when they are busted and the truth comes out. They played russian roulette with their life, marriage and spouse and eventually lost....BIG.
As to your marriage, I know it is early, but Id encourage you to think of it differently, as in, its been assassinated. Assassinated and cremated. Only ashes remain. The only question is, can something new, authentic and real be built? Even ashes can be utilized to pour a brand new foundation, however, the massive amount of work it will take is daunting in the extreme. I said before it will be well nigh unto a vertical climb.
It is early and you need time to process for sure. As you do, increase your level of self care and keep posting here.
