SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I wish you could get angry at being lied to, cheated on, disrespected, etc.

That would certainly help you end it.

I would advise against continuing this relationship. Move on and find someone more aligned with your monogamous lifestyle. If you disregard, pay little attention to her words and pay close attention to her actions. For instance, you would be within your rights to ask her if she would be willing to contact her AP wife to confess to her. Observe her reaction closely. Giving the wayward a hard task or even suggesting a hard task to perform is the fastest way I know to get at the truth of have they changed. I should add that her not wanting to do that does not necessarily mean she has not changed. Observe closely her attitude as she communicates her objections with you. Do not make this an ultimatum rather frame it as being the right thing to do. This MAY give you insight into that question about her changing.

It takes time for heart to catch up with your head. And yes, you should be grieving. You lost trust, respect, love, kindness, the future you envisioned. It sucks. It hurts. But you will heal from it.

(And I agree, some anger here would be helpful for you.)

Grief is normal - you're learning that you've been betrayed in a long-term relationship.

It's not easy to split up, but sometimes it's the best option.

Don’t let fear ruin the rest of your life.