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Hello, having a lot of pity parties over here. Hands down my wedding (second one) was the best day of my life. It’s ruined. Just like so many memories that now don’t feel real. What are some new best days of your lives that you guys have created?

What a great post!!!

I love running and have a bucket lists of runs. Last week I participated in one of these runs and husband and I made a weekend of it. He even ran in the 5km event (he really does not like running) and I also won my age category with a prize!!!!

It was in an amazing location and really was an amazing weekend for us.

Thank you! Thank you! That’s exactly the kind of inspiration I am begging for - except not running. 😆

I had a best moment ever yesterday.

Went on a 10 mile bike ride around town, stopped at The Arboretum on the local campus. There’s a pavilion covered with sunshades that overlooks a field, with a backdrop of a local ridge line covered in trees. Starlings were zipping back and forth at low level, catching whatever bugs were hanging out in the grass. It was hot, with a nice breeze causing the sunshades to flutter. I sat there for a good 20 minutes just being there, in the moment, taking it in.

I’ve learned that there are Best Moment Evers sitting around in lots of places waiting to be experienced. Lying in bed with a thunderstorm in the distance. That first bite of a good burger. Watching kids play. They all beat memories. Don’t get so caught up looking somewhere else, especially in the past, that you miss where you are. 🙂

[This message edited by HouseOfPlane at 11:57 AM, Sunday, June 23rd]

The best day of my life was when I was sitting on a beach on a perfect day with my husband, holding his hand, and watching our kids play in the sand. I asked someone to take a picture of us because it was just a moment I wanted to capture and relive forever. I look at that picture whenever I’m feeling depressed or stressed out.

It was a moment that would have never been possible if I hadn’t mustered the strength and the will to leave my ex.

When I took the keys to my new house. I felt so proud of myself and at peace.
And when I adopted two cats during COVID.
And when I woke up with the sun on my face, birds chirping outside, and I realized that the first thing I thought of was not the A.

Like HoP said, best moments can be everyday moments and not necessarily big things. Look for them and you will find them.

(And it’s a great idea to start looking for them. Kinda like a virtual gratitude journal.)

Hope you accept your pity parties but don’t let them hang around too long.

I love this because I recently read we don’t really heal to overcome pain, we heal to let more emotions in and to be able to feel joy and happiness again.

I have had many best days since dday. Watching our kids succeed. We have had two college graduations and one more coming up in December. Two weddings. The birth of each of our grandchildren and hearing them call us by the names they gave us.. We have watched them get promotions and move past their starter homes. We have twins coming in February for one after a painful time of trying to conceive.

We have traveled and seen some of the most beautiful places in the United States, watched sunsets at beaches and in deserts, and behind snow capped mountains. We have hiked and kayaked and looked at nature in wonder.

And recently, in our back yard under my favorite tree, almost seven years after dday, exchanging rings alone and saying all the things we feel, and feeling blessed in finding each other even if the road was extremely treacherous for some period of time. I still see our original wedding day as one of our best days because there are so many things woven into the tapestry of our marriage that don’t include pain and betrayal.

When you are going through it, it’s all consuming, when you get past it, at least in our experience you can still see the good that came from our union too. And in many ways we have reached a time when it feels like the good exceeds the bad.

There is renewal in life to be found even if it’s not with your current spouse. But for us, R was the right choice. But what is most important is making your own life good, looking after your own happiness. Best wishes, and no matter what your path leads you as far as your marriage, you haven’t lived all your best days yet, I promise.

[This message edited by hikingout at 7:08 PM, Sunday, June 23rd]

My heart is bursting having read all of your thoughtful and loving posts. I thought you guys would say something very predictable and structured that were things I could copy to try to grab that new best day. I still want that - the waking up with my bestie and getting ready for this gloriously bigger than life event with the man of my dreams that lasts deep into the night with so much family and love. I loved every bit of our wedding from the act itself to eating tacos in our wedding clothes in between events to all of the friends who brought individual pieces to make our last minute simple day perfect. And it was perfect.
What I’m hearing you say is that there will be more perfect days in my future (I’m only in my 40’s). Try to stop looking and hoping for an entire huge perfect day to compete with my wedding day. Instead focus right now on perfect moments. I could try to have one perfect moment a day. And record those moments in a journal that is only for perfect moments. And then, maybe those moments will be enough, or maybe before I even realize it they will turn into perfect hours and then days. Let’s see - today three women were in my house for several hours and we alternated between reading, showing each other art we love, dreaming about our future fulfilling activities, we ate strawberry shortcake and we all sat as close to each other as sisters would. My tween fell asleep on the couch laying on my legs. Those moments were perfect😍