SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Yuck, you are a nasty, gross, vomit-inducing individual.

There are not enough hot showers in this lifetime, I'll always have your nasty stank on me. Ugh.

That's all.

We have been divorced for 7 months and no-contact for 4 months and I'm finally starting to get over you. Then I get a text from the OBS letting me know that you are spending a few days in a cabin with your 41 year younger AP and her four children.

The young father is so upset because the children are so upset that some old man is kissing their mom and sleeping with her on the couch! They are all under the age of 9 and don't understand what's happening.

And you two pieces of shit don't care, do you? You don't care what you're doing to these young children.

Damnit, they are so hurt and confused!! But you two only care about yourselves. You keep hurting innocent people and children!

I hate both of you so very much right now!!

God, you really deserve each other! I have no idea how you can sleep at night. 73 years old...god, you'd think you would be too old for this kinda shit! But I guess you both are so in love..you just don't care!

Modification filed 2 1/2 years ago! Now you say you want to settle??? Then respond to your attorney and produce the financials needed. Otherwise, the judge may be pissed that you are in contempt - TWICE!

Just f-ing do it!

How did you just walk away after 10 years? How can you even justify your actions. Now that I know and you keep telling me to go file for divorce, you get to run off in to the sunset with her. I am supposed to just let go and move on. I don't even know you, you are not the person that I once loved, that person is dead.

I am angry you are out in public with her, its not even been 4 weeks. You can not see how much pain I am in, and the lies! LIES! Everything is a lie down to saying you dont want a divorce to be with her.

Ok asshat, your having an A, you got caught, you say you love each other, and that's it! Now you feel you are absolved of any wrong doing and everyone needs to move on.

Are you fucking insane? You didn't give me a choice to work on anything, you didn't give me a choice to try to save our marriage, you made the decision to file D. I guess you are over us, Glad you checked out with out even consulting me.

You keep telling me you need to be single but yet you are in love with her? I am still at the point that I want to see you hurt as much as you hurt me.

However, I cannot wait until I no longer allow you take free rent in my head, and you are just a distant memory.

Such wonderful life events for your adult children and you are missing it all. Find the words they need to hear and be the father, and soon to be grandfather, they want and need. Give your ailing mother the gift of reconciliation with your children.

I knew we were having problems. We had a heartfelt conversation, and I thought we talked it out while we were on vacation. You said you wanted to work this thing out.

When we got home from vacation I had sent you flowers to work. Just to remind you I loved you. You seemed to appreciate it. You even initiated intimacy, the night you received them. I wasn't looking for that, but I gladly went along.

2 days later you had sex with him for the first time.

You are a monster.

I can't believe you would toy with my head like that.

I can't believe you are capable such deceit.

But why am I so attached to you? But why do I still want you back now?

I’m glad you are doing the work to better yourself,

I’m glad you have been rebuilding your relationships with our children,

I’m glad we can tolerate each other when sharing the same breathing space,

I’m super glad you now have great relationships with our grandchildren,

really I am glad...

However...why you would think it’s ok to make a WhatsApp group with our kids & include me into it?

I already have a group chat with my kids do I really have to participate in what seems to be another way to gain access to me?

Please...credit me with even a little bit of sense!!!!

And now I find out today that you have moved in with your 41 year younger girlfriend and her 4 children...

God, how fuckin' stupid can you be? You don't even like children and now you're living with 4 of them under the age of 9.

Have you forgotten you're 73 years old? Have you forgotten that your girlfriend is 41 years younger than you? What kinda fuckin' fantasy world are you in, man?

So are you guys just gonna sit around and talk about your love of "Lord of the Rings"? That was the initial attraction, right? Do you think you're gonna have time for that now with 4 kids around?

You are so fuckin' stupid! I hope you both rot in hell!!

Dear H,

I know I said some things the other night that were hurtful, and I was wrong, so wrong. I try to tell myself I shouldn't feel bad because you said all that same shit and more to me, so many times. That is no excuse, though. I don't want to be a person who says hurtful shit to other people, ever.

I apologise for that and I hope someday you forgive the things I said, although I know forgiveness is a gift and you will give it if or when you damn well please.

Now the other thing is, you have shown me without a doubt that you are not marriage material. If that man in the picture is your "New You," I don't want any part of it. I despise people like that, always have. If a picture is worth a thousand words, that picture says "irresponsible, immature, alcohol abuse, deadbeat dad."

You were supposed to be here today. we were going to talk about our marriage and separation and try to make an agreement that would work. You said you would be here and make waffles.

You said you were a new man after your stroke, that you wanted to be the kind of man I needed and love me with a "grown-up" love. Remember that?

You said you were not going to give up on us. You said you knew I still have a lot of hurt and bitterness but you were going to ride it out. Remember?

You said you were going to do whatever it takes. Whatever it takes to prove to me that you were a new and better man, a good man, worthy of my love. Remember saying that?

In fact,the whole stupid fight started because I wanted to be left alone to study and you wanted attention. But demanding I take time away from studying to pay attention to you is not being supportive of me getting into medic school, which you said you would be. Remember that?

I said I needed space away from you, and I was right. Once I got some breathing room, I started to miss you a little bit. Once you weren't in my face all the time, I was able to focus on the things I like about us. I was able to think about our shared experiences and our shared history. Fucked up as it is, it's still ours.

SO I was going to tell you I didn't want to be so harsh any more. I don't like myself being that way. I wanted to talk things out like adults and make some rules we could both live with. I was going to make dinner and suggest we cuddle up on the couch and watch "The Story of Us." I was going to make love with you.

All I needed was a little time, a little space, and to feel in control of my life once more. If you had given that, and did all the other things you said you were going to do, we would be happily drinking coffee and eating waffles right now.

But instead, you had to blow it. You gave up on us after only 5 weeks. Gave me the silent treatment for 3 days. Stayed out all night without a word, acting like a 16 year old at a keg party. So much for all that mature-love crap.

Happy LAST anniversary, douchehole. 35 years ago, I was so happy and so in love. I thought you were, too.

You have mistreated me for the last time. No more lies, no more ignoring me, no more put downs, no more tiptoeing around you and your mood.

Good riddance to bad rubbish.

[This message edited by leafields at 12:05 AM, December 23rd (Wednesday)]

This year was our 28th anniversary, but you walked out right before our 24th. Now, after more than four years of taking care of the kids (now 25, 21, 14), paying ALL the income tax bills, replacing the AC in the home you stopped paying for w/o telling me and having it foreclosed on, after watching you play house with a fat fuck jerkoff who is never going to divorce his wife (she doesn't care, as long as HE pays HER med benefits), enjoy the new house you two built, since you're not on the docs I guess if he jettisons you you'll end up with NOTHING. Good. You are a selfish, lying, cheating bitch. That I did not see that until it was too late is forever to my shame. I do have four wonderful kids (aside, they don't think very highly of you. Too bad), and I AM SO FUCKING HAPPY THAT THIS IS ALMIST AT ITS CONCLUSION. FINALLY, peace, quiet, NO YOU IN MY LIFE. I don't even want karma for you, I know that, when the time comes to add up that great ledger, your pages are really gonna be empty on the plus side.

YOU and your indifference probably lead to our one daughter's death, it has surely lead to our son's issues and our youngest's current personality. You fucked them all over just as if you had beaten them with a lead pipe. You fucking bitch. If I could make a real wish, have my kids but not you, I would wish it in a second. NO FREAKING HESITATION.

JUST

FUCK

OFF

ALREADY

As of a few hours ago, you are a new Grandpa. I wonder if you'll ever hear her call you that?

Get over yourself and contact your son.

You are one sick mofo to use our mutual friend's death to make it about YOU and YOUR life and how YOU are suffering.

Your first grandchild is 4 days old. Do you know? Are you even aware you are a grandfather? Has your mother told you?

If you do know, why havent you contacted your son?

Is it because YOU still feel like you are the victim? Is that more important than contacting your son who has just become a father?

Once again, WE did not cheat, lie and steal. How can YOU be a victim here?

So you say you're closer to getting it and understanding something I told you almost 35 years ago? I do believe you think you're sorry. As much as you can be, you probably are. Doesn't mean you've dug into the broken person you are that decided to totally ignore me and treat me like crap, selfishly using porn instead of maintaining a relationship with me.

You're such a selfish jerk. You never tried to maintain a relationship with me. I was just an object to you. So ready to be divorced.

I hope you're sitting there tonight in a big huge fucking pile of regret (never remorse). Shame on you for being a coward and the collateral damage and hurting of others that comes from that.

I know more than you think I do.

I don't mind that you continue to come over and get more of the shit you accumulated throughout the years. What I do mind is that you take the good things and leave me the crappy ones. Did you really need to take both dustpans? You took every spatula? You don't even cook. Thanks for leaving the old broken iron, but you took the good ironing board.

I missed being with you today. I missed celebrating this inauguration day with you. It was oh so triggering, given your great interest in politics. I watched with you back in 2016, in devastation, when Trump won, and would have loved to have been with you and your family watching Biden be sworn in.

I hope you watched with your daughter, as I know she would have loved to see a woman being sworn in as VP.

It's been a really, really hard couple of days. Your silence is deafening. But my cognitive dissonance is out in full force as I'm pissed at you for not reaching out, but really also don't want you to reach out.

I thought I was better. Today it feels like I'm not. I feel so alone and isolated. I miss you.

[This message edited by Outoflove2020 at 2:20 PM, January 20th, 2021 (Wednesday)]

Why do I want to text you? I’ve not wanted to for such a long time.

Get out of my head. I don’t want you in there.