SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

AP is married, what do you guys think my next steps are? I don’t know how to verify if my wife is genuine or not, and if/how I dig out the truth?

So sorry you are experiencing this. AP spouse should be aware of the situation 100%… and there should be zero secrecy of cell phones, passcodes, social media… everything should be open. If social media such as FB is a problem it should be deleted altogether. I’m really sorry of the total lack of respect you are receiving. Really start focusing on yourself and your own self care.

I second EmptyGlass. Out A to the OBS. I had my suspicions, but it was OBS and myself working together to uncover the truth. It did provide me with dubious comfort, but comfort nonetheless. I'm SO sorry you're here.

Let the AP's wife know what you know. Share any screen shots or proof you have. Do not warn your wife.

Rebuilding,

Yes 100% tell the other spouse.

It's unfair that 3 of you know about the affair and she does not.

Get all your evidence in order and do not let anyone know you are doing this no warning or threats. This is not meant as a bargaining tool but doing a kindness to the other betrayed spouse.

You WW and OM have harmed the OMW not you, you have no obligation to conceal the truth from OMW.

One thing that I totally didn't believe at the time, but the OBS in my case made a big point to remind me that none of this was my fault or OBS's fault. He found SI first and poor guy had about a week to process everything before he told me....and the world blew up. I was very for the way he let me know. It had to have been tough. Now....I know I had nothing to do with their shitty choices.